Gaming Guru

Jest for Fun

A riverboat casino got caught in a sudden storm on the Mississippi River, and the boat was rolling and rocking violently. A patron in the casino got sick and ran outside to the deck railing. As he leaned over the railing, a deckhand came along and yelled to the patron, "Hey, get away from there. You're not allowed to be sick there!"

The seasick patron glared at the deckhand and yelled back, "Watch!"

* * * * *

A charming young lass applied for a job as a change person.

"What are your qualifications?" asked the interviewer.

"Well," the lass replied. "I always did like to handle money."

* * * * *

Casino patron to cocktail server: "Hey, whatever happened to that stupid, ugly blond who was working here last night?"

Cocktail Server: "She still works here."

Patron: "Yeah? Where is she?"

Cocktail Server: "You're talking to her. I just changed my wig."

* * * * *

Little is the luck I've had
And, oh, 'tis comfort small.
To think that many another lad,
Has had no luck at all.

* * * * *

Slot attendant to shift manager, "I hate to tell you this, but a lucky player won $2000 on a slot, but I couldn't pay him."

"Why not?" asked the shift manager. "Didn't he have any photo ID."

"No. That's just it. It was the invisible man."

* * * * *

A pit boss broke down from the strain. And after claiming he was Napoleon, he was put away in an insane asylum. One day, he was approached by another inmate, who asked, "Who are you?"

Pit boss: "I'm Napoleon. The conqueror of Europe. Who are you?"

Inmate: "I'm Moses. God gave me the Ten Commandments."

"No, I did not!" a third voice yelled.