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Jest for Fun

If profanity could affect the outcome of a slot game, there would be a lot fewer losers.

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First Things First

Captain to deckhand on a Mississippi riverboat casino: "If the boat hit a big object and started to sink, who would you save first? The young or the older women?"

Deckhand: "Me!"

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You gotta admit one thing about the weather in Las Vegas. It's so wonderful, even the sandstorms don't want to leave it.

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Some of the off-the-strip restaurants in Las Vegas will do anything to get business. I visited one where they had waitresses wearing topless outfits. I'm against it. But my wife didn't believe me.

"You're against waitresses wearing topless outfits?" she asked.

"Sure am," I said. "It's bad enough when they put their fingers in your soup."