Gaming Guru

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Jest for Fun

Q. What air in a casino does everybody cherish?
A. A millionaire.

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There's the story about the Alaskan who hit a multimillion jackpot on Super Megabucks. Back home, he bought a dog sled for $80. But what a sled! It was pulled by ten Cadillacs.

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Players' dreams are the greatest asset of a casino.

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There's no truth to the rumor that Conrad Hilton is planning to buy the Leaning Tower of Pisa, converting it into a hotel, and calling it The Tiltin' Hilton.

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Losing is a bearable price for gambling - provided it's someone else who's doing the losing.

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Sometimes Las Vegas has some really cold winters. I heard that it got so cold one winter that the Flamingo Hilton took out the flamingos and put in penguins.

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I don't want to say the horse I bet on was slow, but you could have bet him to win, place, or live.

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My wife is often asked how she became such an avid slot player. "I don't know," she would answer. "It just happened. I don't blame anybody."