Slotpourri

28 January 2001

By Larry Mak

People who once thought slot machine playing was evil are now playing them. And lightning does not strike them.

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Listen to the little voice inside your head when it tells you to stop playing. Successful gamblers have learned to respect their inner voices.

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All happy slot players are alike. But each unhappy slot player is unhappy in his own way.

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Everything happens to everyone in a casino, providing they have time and money enough.

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Positive thinking:the triumph of hope over experience.

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Most gamblers have nothing else but experience.

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It's wonderful to behold the serene countenance of players with a positive attitude,especially their calm confidence when they hold four aces.

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A positive attitude is believing what you know isn't so.

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In a casino, a good folly is worth whatever you pay for it.

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There are many systems about for playing the slots. And each of them is worse than the other.

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Remember the good old days when dollars to donuts was an even bet.

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Some of those horror movies you see on your casino hotel room TV are simply incredible. My wife and I saw one the other night in which the monster got the girl.

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If science can come up with pain-free dentistry, why can't they come up with pain-free slot machines?

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My luck is so bad, on one trip to Reno I got into the Guinness Book of Records.